What would the Boltano's do?: November 2012

After a few days at home as just the three of us, our visitors arrived. First, Grammy and Grandpop. Then Nana and Papa. And last but not least, Grandma and Gramps. With three sets of grandparents, Parker gets a lot of attention and love. And Jeremy and I welcomed a lot of extra help. Only grandparents are excited -- giddy, even -- to change dirty diapers and hold a fussy baby.

Grammy and Grandpop were here throughout Parker's first week. So they were pretty helpful in teaching us how to cut Parker's fingernails, which are really little claws, and assisting us with Parker's first sponge bath. That bath was a traumatic experience, for Parker and for me, but we can dedicate a separate post for that.

Grammy and Grandpop

Nana and Papa arrived for the beginning of Parker's second week. With their help and encouragement, we took Parker out to lunch at a real restaurant. And we also learned a few extra tricks to burp the little man, as well as to calm him down.

Nana and Papa

Grandma and Gramps arrived in Parker's third week to celebrate not just Parker's arrival, but Parker's first Thanksgiving. We learned a few new tricks for treating diaper rash and cooking a ridiculous amount of food while holding a baby.

Grandma and Gramps

Grandparents. Not too shabby, hey Parker?

Parker, Two Weeks Old

We are so excited to announce that Parker Robert Bolton was born on October 31, 2012 at 10:28 PM. He weighed 7 pounds, 15 ounces; and he measured 20 inches in length. And yes, it was the best Halloween ever, because Parker was a Trick and a Treat!

The Trick: He was one week late.
The Treat: Who cares how late he was, he finally arrived! And he's wonderful!

We went to see the midwives on Tuesday, October 30 for my 41 week appointment. And I was very happy to learn that I was much closer to starting labor than I was the week prior. But still, being one week late, we scheduled our appointment for induction to be on Friday, November 2. We came home, and I decided to spend the day cleaning. And cooking. And baking. The kitchen. The bathrooms. Brunch. Late lunch. And dinner. Apple pumpkin muffins and an apple pie.

By 5:00 PM, I started to feel some movement, and it was much more intense than any of the "practice" Braxton-Hicks contractions that I had been feeling off and on for the past few weeks. And while on a Skype video call with Jeremy's family, they even commented on the fact that it appeared I was having contractions and going into labor.

So we went to bed. But I was awake most of the night, and by 4:00 AM my contractions were starting to get even more intense and were becoming pretty regular. I lied in bed on my side most of the morning, with Jeremy trying to get me to drink water and to eat something. But I have to say, I didn't feel like eating. Which is typically a good indication that something is going on in my body, because I'm always game for food. But honestly, I was not feeling so amazing. I was in early labor, but I was already pretty miserable.

Mostly, I had a lot of pain in my back. By 9:00 AM, I had taken a couple of showers. And by 10:00 AM, I decided to take a bath. By 11:00 AM, I was on all fours in the living room resting my head on the couch. I had a lot of pain, and none of the relaxation techniques I had learned and practiced at my birth classes seemed to be helping. Jeremy noted that I never opened my eyes...

Jeremy had been in touch with our doula, Margie, who planned to come to our house when my contractions were 5-6 minutes apart. But my contractions were pretty irregular, which was definitely frustrating for me. I would get excited when only five minutes passed between contractions, thinking that we were moving into active labor, only for seven or eight minutes to pass until my next contraction, making me think that I had a lot more work ahead.

By 1:00 PM, I really couldn't handle the pain any more, and I was starting to feel pretty anxious. So I asked Jeremy to call Margie and ask her to come over. She arrived by 2:00 PM, and I felt a bit more confident once she arrived. Margie has helped deliver over 300 babies! I encourage all women to work with a doula during their labor. It's amazing how comforting and helpful Margie was. Of course, Jeremy was an amazing support to me, too, but there's something special about having another woman - especially a woman who has participated in so many deliveries - support you through labor.

By 4:00 PM, my contractions were still 5-6 minutes apart. But I was really struggling with the pain. Margie was not confident that I was in active labor yet, so if we went to the hospital, there was a risk that I would be told to go home until I was in active labor. I really wanted to deliver the baby naturally, without any medical intervention. But I was in so much pain, I was starting to have doubts. And I began asking Jeremy and Margie to take me to the hospital so that I could get an epidural. Per my request, Jeremy and Margie tried to ignore my request, telling me that I was doing great and that I had the strength and focus to keep going.

But I couldn't, and I firmly told them that I wanted to go to the hospital. NOW. So we gathered our things and began the four mile *trek* from the Wilmont neighborhood of Santa Monica to the Westwood neighborhood of Los Angeles. A journey of less than 5 miles. And an hour and fifteen minutes later, we arrived at UCLA Ronald Reagan Hospital. WTF?! My worst fear - getting stuck in LA traffic on the way to the hospital - was reality. We spent nearly a half hour at one intersection. And to this day, I wonder why I didn't just get out and scream, "I'm in labor! Let us through!" It was the one moment in my life when I wished Jeremy wasn't always so calm. I would have welcomed some road rage, but it probably was better that he maintained his composure... Also probably a good thing that I didn't jump out into the middle of Santa Monica Boulevard!

After arriving at the hospital, my second worst fear came true. After almost 24 hours of labor - albeit early labor - I was only 3 centimeters dilated. I was going to have to go home unless I requested medication for pain relief, but that wasn't a problem. The only thing worse than all of the pain I felt at home was feeling all that pain while sitting in a car stuck in traffic. For over an hour! Talk about a misadventure!

But of course, there was paperwork and blood work to be done before I could get an epidural. And of course, none of that work was completed quickly. In addition, I had to get an IV. And in the typical Nic and Jeremy misadventure fashion, it took a couple tries before my IV could be started. It took a little over an hour to get the epidural started, and unfortunately, I still felt the pain of my contractions afterwards. And it was too much pain. So I had a second bolus of epidural administered to my back.

For someone who wanted to avoid medication during childbirth, I surely had a change of heart. And I struggled with my decision to receive the epidural for a little while. But Margie made me feel so much better about my decision to "get the drugs!" when after an hour of the epidural, I progressed from 3 centimeters to 6 centimeters. And after another hour and a half, I was at 10 centimeters.

Turns out, I just wasn't able to relax through the contractions. So the contractions weren't helping me dilate. Once I had the epidural -- and I basically lost the ability to control what was happening to me! -- labor progressed very quickly. There was only one other problem. Now that I was fully dilated, the midwife was able to determine the baby's position. And Baby was not in a great position for delivery. Instead of having his head facing my back, Baby Bolton was facing my right side. As such, he was putting intense pressure on my sciatic nerve. No wonder I had so much pain, especially in my back and down my left leg!

So before I could begin pushing, Margie had me lying on my side with my knee on pillows to try to reposition the baby. Not sure if it worked. I don't think it did. But I soon felt the urge to push. So the midwife came back into the room, and the nurse turned the "labor room" settings into the "delivery room" settings. One of these settings included taking OFF my hospital gown, so I was buck naked. Not that I gave a SHIT at that point, but I do remember thinking, "Wow, I'm buck naked here. Let's get this done."

And not surprisingly at all, once I was allowed to begin pushing, I felt pretty awesome. I learned in my childbirth classes that first time moms typically push for two hours. But after pushing two times, I definitely had no desire to let this stage of labor last that long. I pushed with all my might. I even asked if I could push in between contractions. Crazy, right?

There were moments of doubt, too, of course. I couldn't tell if I was making any progress. But soon enough, everyone started telling me that they could see the baby's head, and that our baby was almost here. So I mustered up every ounce of strength I had left in me, and I pushed. And the next thing I knew, Jeremy was placing a little baby on my chest.

"He's not crying!" I remember saying, just as he started to cry. The nurse started rubbing him with a towel to clean him up. I started to kiss the baby, feeling so relieved that he had finally arrived. He... Or she?! "Is it a boy? Or is it a girl?" I asked next. In the excitement of finally delivering the baby -- and might I add, Jeremy CATCHING the baby -- we forgot to note if we had a little boy or a little girl!

But we have a boy. Parker Robert Bolton. 7 pounds, 15 ounces, and 20 inches of boy. He is strong. Within minutes of his birth, he was holding up his head and looking for something to eat. And he is sweet. Just snuggling into my chest, and staring up into his dad's eyes. He is our son. And I am his Mom. Jeremy is his dad, and we are a family. And I am out of words to describe how wonderful it all feels.