Every day I'm Shufflin

Right before I found out that I was pregnant, I had the most amazing run. It was a gorgeous, sunny day. I ran down to Palisades Park in Santa Monica, along the dirt path to the Santa Monica Pier and then back up to San Vicente Blvd. I kept going up the dirt path in the median along San Vicente before going through the “North of Montana” neighborhoods and back to our apartment. I felt like I was flying, and I was getting excited at the chance to best my Personal Record at an upcoming half marathon for which I’d registered.

Within a week, my glorious runs were gone. I use a GPS app on my iPhone when I run to track my pace and distance, so at every mile, it tells me my total time and current pace. One morning, I really thought I was doing great, and I felt like I was really pushing myself. So it was incredibly surprising to hear my app tell me my pace was around 11 minutes per mile. I figured it was a GPS problem, but by the second mile, when I was again hovering around 11 minutes per mile despite being totally out of breath, something didn’t feel quite right. I assumed I was getting sick. Then a few more days passed and I did start getting sick, and well, the rest is history.

Given my “condition” – ha! – I decided to skip the half marathon. But I have continued to run three or four times a week since learning I was pregnant. Let’s be honest, I don’t know if what I’m doing really qualifies as running. It’s definitely a jog, if not a shuffle. Most days, I run incredibly slowly; but I have yet to be passed by a walker, so that’s keeping me motivated. Amazingly, though, I actually want to run more than I did, even when I was super crazy marathon girl trying to qualify for Boston. Maybe it’s because I care more about the run being good for me, and for Peanut, than I care about being fast. Or maybe it’s because I have zero expectations or plans or feelings of guilt related to training for an actual race. Or maybe it’s because I’ve read that women who exercise during pregnancy have easier time with labor, and I’m certainly down with an easier time in labor.

Whatever it is, I am really happy to again feel nothing but happiness when I run. No pressure. No guilt. No expectations. Just every day some shufflin.